One Year Ago Today

One year ago today, I got up the nerve to start my own blog.  I had been reading blogs, infertility related, for 4 years.  In August, I was researching a sunburst mirror and happened upon Three Men and a Lady now 4 Men 1 Lady and spent the next 3-4 hours scrolling through her entire blog.  It was way past midnight at this point.  The next day, I went back for more.  I then discovered her blog list and was hooked.  I hit a couple of Goodwill's and bought a can of spray paint and went at it the next day. Guess what, I loved what I did.  I went back for more.  I had always loved decorating and redoing my home, but I had found myself in a slump. 

At that point, our trying for a baby had made everything else unimportant...even myself.  We were in huge medical/fertility debt, our house seemed like it was falling apart, I hadn't exercised in 4 years, and I had been in a zombie like state for awhile.  Our battle had reached four years to be exact and what seemed like the end of the road for that battle. It was my turn to grieve.  My life was on hold, not hold, stopped.  Something changed that day that I found Michelle's blog.  I felt something in me change.  I wanted to do something for myself.  My afternoons alone no longer meant scrolling through fertility blogs, I wanted to be making something, painting something, fixing something.  The projects started small, but then I challenged myself.  I wanted more and I did more.  

I remember my husband came home the day I started my blog and I showed him what I had done and he kind of laughed it off and said go for it.  I remember my first follower, Sarah from Flourish Design and Style, followed me instantly.  I had no idea how she had found me.  I was elated. Later, I realized that the stats brought her to me.  She made my night. 

I have loved sharing my projects with you, the encouraging words, making friends, and hopefully sharing the love.  Although, the last couple of months have been kind of slow for me on this blog (so much personal stuff going on, it kind of takes over), I love opening my page and finding a new follower. I still tell my husband how many I have.  I truly appreciate and I am so grateful that you choose to read and follow what I do here. It warms my heart. 

So much has changed in me this past year, we are still hopeful for a miracle, but looking into alternatives.  Our medical/fertility debt is completely paid off (whew, this was all me!), I am doing Crossfit, and my home is looking so much more like US.  I have fought my way out of that dark place I was in.  I have worked hard.  There are still times when I have to grieve, but I am good, really good.  There's a huge part of me that thinks this little old blog helped me.  My focus changed, my life changed...I changed.  For that, I thank you all, from the bottom of  my heart.

Via